I resisted! Well… I am lying. He just went back to his city, and this saved from a mistake. I would have felt worse after that. Enough self-destruction!

Friday evening. I am home alone with my crazy thoughts. It is exactly one of those moments when I start thinking a lot and it goes all wrong way. I haven’t had these moments for a long time. My leg is not fine, it is not recovering. I have to take care of it, so that it is fine, to look at its size, color, temperature. I am scared like small children are, but they have their mummy next to them to say that everything will be alright.

I can call to my mom via skype, but I don’t want to. Then, I will have to tell her that I am not fine. She will ask why and how it happened. And I don’t want to tell how, I don’t want to worry her.  She will be so worried that it will only make me feel worse and more scared. I know it sounds strange, but my mom always strengthen my feelings. It is good when I am happy, but when I am scared or depressed, it doesn’t help.

I blame myself in what has happened to me. I just hope it is a good lesson, and I will recover soon! Only getting in these kind of troubles, when I just sit at home (I hardly can walk)  and worry, I realised what a great life I had, I could go to work, to do food shopping, go the the bank, post office. It is a real happiness! I know it sounds strange. We are tired of those things, we hate them. But I changed my mind now. Those thing are real life, yes, hectic, but it is happiness just to walk…

I want to share the lesson I just learnt! The life is great, and the most important thing is heath! Never complain as long as you are healthy,  and you can afford to buy at least bread!

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s